Choosing friends over the Mosque

Yesterday I chose to go to E's house over going to the Mosque open house. I do not want people to think that I chose it because I love football. That is not it at all. Sports is just a social release for me. It is a way for me to interact with other people and the world.

I chose to go to E's house because I love hanging out there every Sunday morning. It has been since I left the Philadelphia area that I had a group of people that I hang out with regularly. I feel like E's group just excepts me. That is really important. If they were getting together on Sunday morning to watch Golf or Martha Stewart, I would still go.

A long time ago I decided that I should put friendships first in my life. It is those relationships that really mean something. I think my relationship with E and his crowd are on that level. I can see them as friends that I keep in touch with even if I leave this area. There is something special about that.

I was asked in the comment box: What is so wrong with filling the hole in your life with spirituality? You grew up very religious as i recall. You'll probably always have some latent need for ritual and substantive belief in your life.

Something about this idea scare me. I have seen other people do it in the past. It has worked for some of them, but most of them have cause more problems with their lives then they solved. I am afraid to become one of those people who thinks God is in control of everything and they are not reasonable for anything. That is not how I envision God. If I am lonely and I need to meet more people, it is bad for me to fill that hole with religion.

I feel that I do need to work on the spiritual aspects of my life. I have been ignoring them for a long time. I just do not know what is the right way to turn. I have some ideas about God, but I do not feel these ideas in my heart. There are aspects of lots or religion that make sense to me, but not all of any religion. On the other hand, I am not sure how much religion is supposed to make sense anyway.

Islam is an odd religion to me. There are parts of it that make total sense, but there are other parts that I do not agree with. I have been looking at it for a while, but I has always been staying a distance away from it. I am not sure it is good to separate women and men like I read Islam does. I am not sure Islam is religion that people practice at different levels.

What I want is a way to be more spiritual without it clobbering my life as a whole.


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